The repercussions of that decision to leave the EU have continued to stir up in me those feelings and many more as I've felt deeply unsettled at what is going on right now.....
On Saturday I attended the annual Street Choirs festival. Thirty plus choirs from across the country got together to sing around the streets of Leicester and to hold a concert in the evening. I was told that this festival was a bit political at times (but I wasn't told how political!!) - a number of the choirs that attended are committed to protesting and expressing issues of justice through song. I heard songs expressing frustration about the break up of the NHS, the austerity cuts, justice, TTIP... and of course, a specially written song about the referendum decision which was beautifully sung with amazing harmonies and spoke into the very core of my frustrations.
After what I don't want to mention happened, the reactions on social media were passionate... and people lashed out....
And then the voice of Michael Winner came out..... (well not actually his voice but it felt like it).... 'calm down'. A number of posts appeared within a couple of hours that said that the decision was made and basically us remainers needed to 'get over it and move on'.
And that made me even more angry.....
Because I believe that lament, that expressing emotion, that expressing frustration, is important for our well being. To be told to calm down and get over it when such a huge decision that plunged us into the unknown is challenging to our very core.....
On Saturday I attended the annual Street Choirs festival. Thirty plus choirs from across the country got together to sing around the streets of Leicester and to hold a concert in the evening. I was told that this festival was a bit political at times (but I wasn't told how political!!) - a number of the choirs that attended are committed to protesting and expressing issues of justice through song. I heard songs expressing frustration about the break up of the NHS, the austerity cuts, justice, TTIP... and of course, a specially written song about the referendum decision which was beautifully sung with amazing harmonies and spoke into the very core of my frustrations.
Being there I was reminded of the importance of expressing how we feel.... of standing up and saying (singing) 'no' when we disagreed... of expressing anger and lament when it's necessary and of expressing joy and solidarity when that is needed too....
It reminded me of those Psalms where the Psalmist expresses their grief and frustration over their own situation and over the situation of the nation as they look to God for help and protection. It reminded me of those songs of lament written in exile that we pick and choose from to miss out the difficult bits.... By the rivers of Babylon we sat and wept..... we sang.... and we were angry, so angry (read Psalm 137 to the end, it's unsettling.....).
There are many people who are writing at the moment who express how I feel better than me (like here)....so I'm not going into the whys and wherefores of why I'm so sad......
But, yes, I will continue to express my frustration..... I accept that I am going to have to deal with it as together as a country we move into unknown territory and tackle the issues of racism that have come to a head because of the decision and watch while biting fingernails as we face uncertainty in our government..... I also believe we've got to pray and I believe we have got to seek peace as we step ahead.
But I also believe we need space to lament.
And I will continue to sing songs of protest...... I will continue to have moments where I feel like weeping and I will continue to feel on edge.....
How do we sing the Lord's song in this strange post referendum land?
I'm not sure.... I'm working that one through......
What I do know though is that I will never stop singing....
